This year has been great blah blah blah. BUT FIRST! Let's celebrate the birth and 24th year of survival by Steven Ho-Man Ma! The most fun bilf foc'r anyone could ever dream of!





OKAY. Enough with the festivities and celebration! Woo Hoo. Some of the smooshy stuff : gr8st bf evah. And then some serious wisdom for him: Do not eat gum from under the library table even though it's purple (which is my favorite color) & grape (which is my favorite flavor)! So there. Forever documented on the internet. The funnest birthday he has ever had (according to me!).

Family is so fun! I love Christmas lights! I love lights! I love wine! I love Christmas presents! I love wrapping gifts! I love making shirts! I love my parents! I love my sister! I love my Grandma! I love family! I love warm food! I love tofu! I love pork! I love watches! I love cell phones! I love wallets and drivers licenses! I love cheesecake! I love consumerism! I love friends! I love APSA! I love mass text messages! I love personalized text messages! I love Target! I love cheap things! I love Taiwan! I love Parent who love Taiwan! I love Parent who does not really love Taiwan! I love blush! I love long sleeves! I love pants! I love sweatpants! I love lying about loving sweatpants! I love good grades! I love passing the last Science class I'll ever have to take forever and ever! I love science loving boypren! I love bike riding really slow! I love fixing my busted innertube and tire all by myself almost! I love clean nails! I love getting my nails done in unionized nail salons! I love making plans to get nails done at a unionized nail salon! I love making plans! I love planning! I love writing in a journal that is two years old and almost over! I love long sentences! I love short sentences! I love water! I love holiday cups! I love duck! I love blogs! I love San Gabriel! I love fruit! I love cookies! I love winter smoosh on my belly! I love planning to get ripped with muscles! I love blinking! I love red! I love green! I love green and black and white! I love being kind of mean to mean people even though it's not something you should be proud of! I love exclamation points! I love people who love to read! I love you!

Merry Happy Christmas Holidays!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=89oS4SN4mNg

(She won't let me embed it, so watch that!)

At least. At least. Britney has some semblance of dance at the end. Okay. I'm going to wash my quickly-becoming-dreads hair. YUCK!

I am a blog addict. No, more an internet reader. It is possibly the only reason I have a computer. I spend hours a day pouring over news, how-tos, pictures of lolcats and hipsters. It's kind of disgusting. The reason I am noticing now is that I have not pulled out my planner in three days. I know that all the pages will be blank for the entire day. Nothing from 10AM until 10PM. Absolutely. Empty. It definitely feels really weird. I just sit around. On the internet. Okay, no. With the internet. Reading. I read other books too, about stupid socialites in New York. But yeah, this is my break so far.

Things I Want to Do
Drive on the Freeway
Go to a museum
Ride my bike get food
Ride my bike to the park
Ride my bike
Watch one entire season of King of the Hill
Watch a Movie
Get Wisdom Teeth Pulled

I'll add more later.

I am such a majestic winner. I am everything that is amazing about me. I love myself.

http://www.kongregate.com/games/Ninjakiwi/bloons-tower-defense-2

I WIN!

Tonight it really hit me how I do need to take care of myself. Mondays tend to be my crazy days, but I guess I usually keep going. But today, damn it, today. My life feels so crazy right now. I feel sometimes (read: most times), people just take me as a given almost. That I'll be there, that I'll step up, that I'll send email, make posters, go to meetings, handle shit from admin, be mommy. I feel like I do my work, bits and parts and even the entire job of other people and damn. It really. Starts. To. Add. Up. I didn't get the fellowship I wanted. My mom's in the hospital. I have papers to write. My mom's in the fucking hospital. They are cleaning my apartment's carpet so I have to make sure everything is off the ground? My mom isn't well, and it scares me every minute. My family is everything to me, and it's just so damn hard. I can't even write anything, you know? I blew up at Jesse tonight. Sorry. You are me here and I am so sorry that I can't always be strong enough. Sometimes though, everything is a bit too much for one person to handle. I'm this big fat mess on her period. I'm trying and giving everything I've got. So I guess this is just me asking people to step up. I just wish I didn't feel bad asking people to do stuff. I don't know, worthless bitching I guess.

Anyways. Here is my bike! Not the bike I had before, baby mama drama rama behind me now..





It makes me happy! One of the few things. I need to start eating well again. Cooking. Reading. Watching bad TV with room mates. Listening to music that's soul purpose is not just to calm me down. Riding my bike with Ry Ro and co. Having space in my schedule that is labeled dinner with friends. Having space in my planner that isn't labeled as all. Damn. I'm just listing things I want and not thinking achievement! Okay. Good. Alright.

I'm too big for my new jeans. I guess it's another two weeks waiting for the mail. I'm shipping them to school this time, but wouldn't it suck so bad if they didn't come? Maybe I should ship them home..

Bike shopping tomorrow with my dad! I'm so excited to be living straight. My life of crime is behind me!

At home. I have work to do, but meh. I think I'm going to wash my sheets that I brought home to wash (saving me a hefty dollar fifty that I can put towards other crap!) and my bangs, and then watching Freedom Writers until I pass out. It's so cold!

My feet are freezing. I take my dad's big white socks when I am at home, because I leave my multi-colored small socks at school. I feel bad because I get the bottoms so dirty! I don't even know how? I am looking at the bottom of my feet and shaking my head because I lose face.

Yup. What's up? What kind of detergent do you use?

No more bike. These are somethings that I have found interesting today.

Yellow Face in Hollywood

http://www.asianweek.com/2007/11/28/the-25-most-infamous-yellow-face-film-performances-part-1/
Mitt Romney is an idiot.

I am currently watching most of the videos from the Republican CNN/Youtube debates. Can I just say how amazing youtube is? I mean, look at how it works. Man, mind-blowing. I am pretty interested in what the Republicans have to say though. Hmm.

We were waiting for pizza. I will introduce my new bike later.

I have done participated in much consumery of late! But really, I've invested in some quality things such as blush!! I really like blush a lot. It goes way back after eighth grade when I found that aZn was not such a good look for me. Or rather, I could not find a solid word that fit me (BbYbUmBlYbOoOpOoPoO is not that cute contrary to your very popular beliefs!). Anyways, I have never bought a nice blush. So I did!!! I tried or several different blushes, but since I knew that I wanted to go with a more grown up color instead of a bright sparkley pink (also because I have this great one already that I bought because Kate Moss was selling it, in the advert not to my face [WOMP WOMP]). Anyways, I like it a lot. Yes. WOW!

I am getting my camera soon. Substantial Posting!

Last weekend was also my birthday. I forgot to write about that! I am nineteen! That is all. But here are pictures of the cakes that I ate!!





Jake made the first one and Miss Amanda Terry made the second one! Okay, I have to run to APSA board meeting now!!



This is what I am eating right now. It is a turkey and cheese sandwich and I am drinking crappy tea that is still satisfying because it tastes like warm watered down juice!!!

Students Of Color Conference was pretty tight. Like Kevin Kwong said though, it wasn't as empowering as we hoped, but it challenged our consciousness and that cool.

I have an interview of the Helen Zia fellowship. RAD!!

Life is good. I'm so tired. I am healing all the time.

Really crappy day.
Feeling better playing with (Fluff) friends on facebook.
Thank's Peter Hall.

This is my city.

Onto some WOMP WOMP news. I need to send my camera back because the flash doesn't work anymore and I still have a one year warranty good.

http://www.viceland.com/int/v14n9/htdocs/ctrl.php?country=uk

Insane. Crazy. How does Vice do pieces like this? How? What? Crazy!

So right now I am reading this research article on the influences of Seventeen magazine and YM on adolescent girls. It makes me really pissed. I will admit that I fall guilty of reading these glossy overpriced advice columns. I guess I'm noticing for the first time that all these girls study these and really believe them! It's one of those things you never notice until it's snapped to attention. HO SHIT THOUGH!! It makes me so so mad! YUCK.

Bitch Blog.

So in Asian American Studies today, we learned about the edict in San Francisco that prompted the Gentleman's Agreement for Japanese immigrants in the US. Basically, in San Francisco, something was issued that said orientals (meaning Chinese and Japanese) could not attend the same schools as white kids. I'm reading all over Asian blogs ( www.apiablogs.net & www.angryasianman.com ) that Trader Joes has decided that they will not provide any food products from China anymore. Really? I mean, really? I can't shop at Abocrombie (did I even spell that right, that's now little I care), I'm wary about H&M (I need tank tops! I need equality!), but now Trader Joes??? I love Trader Joes. But yeah. This reminds me of something that happens on a small scale, but basically turns everything around. Think about that.

My life has been out of order. I forget tiny things. I left my freaking ipod in the Cross!!! I asked Daryl to grab something from my room, but ended up not needing him to go, and forgot to ask for my keys back. I went to see Skeve and left my wallet on my bed in my room! I left my contact case but lugged around my contact solution. They were new contacts!!!

The fires are crazy. I am just so thankful Dorosister is safe.

I'm really excited. Not going to lie! This year is shaping out to be so amazing. I have goals for this year! I feel really alive right now. I haven't posted in a while. but here it is. I am counting down 24 hours and it's something like 18 hours!! I don't know. I'm tired and I'm going to read Chaka until I pass out. Jesse Cheng for At-Large Rep!!! I leave you with this. If he can love puppies, so can you!!



www.cuteoverload.com

Go There NOW!

This is what it looks like to walk back to your bike at 2AM in the rain and know that you have to be up by 8AM at the flagpoles for another retreat. This is what it looks like to have an extension of yourself. This is what tired looks like after hitting up four things and realizing that the last one was the best. This is what the best looks like.

Finishing the Game

This was amazing. It turned out so well, got APSA out there again, but most importantly. The Asian Pacific Student Association is now known for specific reasons. Roger Fan answered the last question so well. I forget the question (propz to Kevin Kwong), but the answer was so empowering. It was something like Asian Americans need to unify, because that is the only way we can win battles and make change. We give things up, let ourselves be fucked with, in exchange for success and monetary gain. But these people don't want to remember how we've been denied everything. That the reason Asian men are called asexual is because they were denied families. That we are always overlooked because they assume with will just buy in with the white mass market. The sad thing is that we do. But the way that his message was heard by over 90 students who really listened was amazing.







Right there. I met this really cool guy who is a vendor at the vendor fair. I'm going to bring my camera with me more. Woot.

This past weekend I went home in what felt like a century. After three weeks of being away, I needed to get away from all this. I want to go home again. These are the blankets that I sleep with at home. The green blanket was the dad's blanket for the two years he was in the Taiwanese Army. The pink blanket is a cover over this beautiful green pattern that I've slept with for as long as I can remember. My mom made this blanket when I was small, and it's been mine since then. The underside of this blanket is yellow. It's covered with this pink cloth now, but it's still the same core. That's it.

I feel better.





ir3allyn33dsl33p: penis rocket ------- 8=====D

Identity Protected!

This week has been been discouraging. I'm glad it's hump-day so I know that things will get better. Don't get me wrong, I'm trying to stay positive, but I have learned from today alone that being a student who believes in any sort of cause makes you automatically marginalized. I feel like I've been pouring myself into APSA, and while it has made me love people like no other, it's also been really hard to gain support from everyone else (the man). I hate drama. I don't have any desire to climb a hierarchy of bullshit. I don't want to over throw the student government. I don't want to be the center of attention. And I do not want to jeopardize who I know I am just because of stupid stuff that happens. After being chewed out I walked out the door and starting crying and calling Jesse Cheng who is like gangrene on my leg that I keep wanting to chop off but it will hurt too much and ended up missing the first meeting I set up because I was so upset. I am not that strong of a person. Here it is. I am trying my hardest to be a good friend / organizer / student / partner / sister / leader I can be.

Last night Al did this really great activity where there was a list of over forty values and we had to pick ten narrow it down to five, then four - three - two - one.:

Community
Effectiveness
Involvement
Responsibility and Accountability
Order
Meaningful Work
Ethical Practice
Friendships
Having a Family
Inner Harmony


I'm putting this here to remind myself of what I value most. This is the way I lead. What better way to get to know me, right.

But on a very positive note, aside from WOW MOM awkwardness, I am so proud of Hip Hop Congress. I went to the meeting and Taha and Geo are amazing. I am so excited for this year, still. It will be majestic!

Here are three things that make me happy:


How fully stocked our fridge is.


Dorosister in the woods with her new red glasses

This girl named Maeghan Magante gave me this pin tonight at the APSA meeting. I met her last year in my Asian American Studies 60C discussion. She wrote really big and crazy with black black ink and had more answers than me. (Which is a lot I think!) She also got me erasers. She picked up the pin and the erasers from the Philippines this past summer. She is all about her roots and taking back her culture. I like her because she is all about being a Filipina who is brown and down. She wants to be involved in APSA and I am so so excited.

It's been a really exhausting week but I'm glad we went through it. I think board is so strong this year, and I can't wait to see how it goes from here. Al is the best at holding gatherings. Melanie Lee, Eric Chow, Kevo and I ended up sitting on Al's steps and talking about everything.

So that has been my day. I really need to pass out now.

This is my life. Isn't our booth so cute!



This makes me happy.


When I moved in this bike had two wheels. Yesterday it had one. And now it has none. WOMP WOMP.

PS: Shout out to my bilf foc'r.

Welcome Week has just begun. I guess I will write about all the adorable freshm@n. Man. That was me last year. I am so tired. There were just so many cute cute kids!! I'm excited. Anthony Ngo was right, our publicity this year is so sick. I'm excited. There are some issues that need to be smoothed over, and that shit had me stressed out, but I think tomorrow will just go better. There was this one intense kid. I think her name was Norma? She was so cute and she kept asking me what APSA is and does and I know I love her already. I need to adjust my TV and sleep soon. I'm just so excited.

Tonight I went and caught up with my dorm friends/ heart to heart buddies. I was so tired though. We had some jello, candy corn, and wine and sat around catching up. I love them so much. I'm tired now. Soo tired. I just spent thirty minutes deciphering the sign up sheet so we could be prompt with that. I just really want to do a lot this year. I want APAAC to be huge again. I want a massive mobilization of progressive UCI kids!! Alright. This is babble. But that is who I am right now.

This is Cristobal Enrique Jimenezjimenezjimenez.

He lived in my dorm last year. I met him through the game of Assassins. I had to find him and kill him so I stalked him down on facebook and was the first person to kill anyone. He calls me Auntie Peaches and Garce Yonug and I call him Cristobal even though his real name is Christopher Henry Jimenez. He cooks for me and is very strong. He dresses nicely and helps out with APSA. I adore him



I love APSA. I spend all my time with Jesse and Al and more time with Geo. I will make that post, but I've just been crazy with things to do. I have to run out soon.

!!!!!


Yesterday on the plane I was shoved between a busy business man who scarfed don't his honey roast peanuts and someone who looked like a full grown Chris Ryan. Square tall white and in a green and white striped polo shirt. I read American Gods and he read the Harvard Business Review. I listened to Curtis and he kept messing with the air vent fan. We talked about glass ceilings for women in the workplace, and his sister who just had her first baby in Texas. He is a business man and one of his buddies likes the show Laguna Beach. He wants to have kids eventually, even though I told him that kids are not sustainable. He was very nice. I hope he can find someone to marry him and complete his perfect OC story. I think he recycles!


This is what my room looks like.


This was my first meal in college that I ate in my apartment. It is leftover Vietnamese food. But it counts.


These are my new grown up glasses that I do not even wear. I put them on this morning but today I think I will try to get dressed and look normal because this slum lord thing is not working so good all the time.


This is me from last summer around the same time when I first for my glasses. I look the same. But my hair is three tiny bits different.

I am at the Regents meeting. It is crazy. I am disappointed in the Regents, but then again, when is there another sentiment? Oh well. I love APSA. It is comfort food in a very hungry world, which is fitting since I did not get a fancy lunch. I got a lunch in a box. There were corn made utensils. I'll get a picture. I am waiting for the Regents and Presidential Search Committee. I am sucked in. Alright, and update in my life. Very uninteresting, but life will get better.

I've been obsessed with this song for the past five million years. It literally took me three listens so get everything. Right There.

Beautiful girl

All my sisters in the house tonight
If you're feeling my alright
But one in particular yo

My listener my lover my sister my god
I love the way you fit in the clench of my palm
And it's hard when phone calls is all that I have
But I don't sweat it too much I keep you where ever I'm at.
My punk rock stilettos fishnets and a skirt
Just as fly as in chuck taylors denim jeans and a shirt
Every argument is a chance to build up on this here
I apologize for how I make you feel when I swear
I'm right there when your past creeps right back in
I'll be your pitt bull
Tell me who and I'll bite at them
I just want to keep you safe and build you up when you down
Can you reciprocate that feeling without making a sound
You push me up to be a better man and think of my fam
Bell hooks our communion books stay in my hand
The patriarchy thats in-bedded in my soul no more
I look at you and wonder what I ever did that for
The B-word I prefer to call you by name
Never call you a thing never bring the slightest to shame
My boys be thinking I changed
But I just found where it's at
707 Valejo is where my womyn stay at
It's miles away but she stays closer than most
LA is where I stay but with her is my home
I'm home for you mesto with the music I make
Everytime I hold your brown hand and kiss your brown face

You keep it right there hold it right there baby yeah
The world is crumbling right now but I don't care
I'm right here with the beautifullest girl in the world
Ahh I like it right there mmm right there
You keep it right there hold it right there baby yeah
The world is crumbling right now but I don't care
I'm right here with the beautifullest girl in the world
Ahh I like it right there mmm right there


So here we are my love
This is the pure rhythm of my heart unplugged
So raw that it doesn't even match to a beat
And the emotion so strong I can hardly speak
Have I ever told you how I et distracted by your beauty
And giddy I get when I think of you and me
Our unity is more than just husband and wife
It's way more than just saying your the love of my life
Words could never do justice to our song
What we have is whats left when the music is gone
The eternal promise that we seal with a kiss
That we have permanently tattooed on our wrists
And with this we resist all this sexist conditioning
And model our love with a union that is genuine
And build our family through struggle and growth
Through those simple little moments when you're holding me close
Our bodies fit together perfect
Like pieces in a puzzle
Cause revolution is bigger than a single couple
Cause we make up a whole community of energy
And it all starts here with you here next to me

You keep it right there hold it right there baby yeah
The world is crumbling right now but I don't care
I'm right here with the beautifullest girl in the world
Ahh I like it right there mmm right there
You keep it right there hold it right there baby yeah
The world is crumbling right now but I don't care
I'm right here with the beautifullest girl in the world
Ahh I like it right there mmm right there

This is Steven Ma.



I have chosen decidedly attractive photos of him because he is a very svelte man. I met him last year because he was everywhere. The first time I talked to him I was selling chicken fried rice (Check It Out!) for APSA and he came and gave me a lot of shit. He tried to buy the entire pan in exchange for his wallet. I am looking at it right now. One time I went to eat at In-n-Out with my now ex-boyfriend. I was so full that I made him sit on the sidewalk with me so I could take a nap. Guess who came on his bicycle! Steven MA! Steven Ma asked how he (I don't think he wants his name here! FOCUS ON SKEVE!) could deal with such a crazy girlfriend. I DON'T KNOW STEVVVEEE. How do you deal! He is creepy. But he's pretty good looking so I keep him.


This is what we look like when we brush our teeth.

Next Post: APSA BOARD!!!! I promise it'll be sweeeet.

Thought you'd like to know.

I KNOW.. So on a more positive note:


If there is anything to know about Grace Young (since Al so lovingly pointed out that this is a blog about me and getting to know me [and people in my life blah blah]), it is that my favorite to buy anything (almost) is used. My favorite things today, apparently, are parentheses. Do they count as one? A pair? Anyways. I love to buy things used. Give me an entire day to sift through the treasures at the Salvation Army. I can spend hours at Goodwill. I love to dig through what people don't want. Most of the times, there is something that I want. I think the world to too wasteful. No one can really argue with that. But I always inevitably feel this overwhelming sense of guilt when I buy something new. I get the same feeling in my guy when I think that animals die sacrifice themselves for the cause of bacon. But the difference is, there is more to wear than there is to eat. Maybe that is because clothing, unlike food, does not turn to crap when you are done with it. It can be recycled. Plus, it makes me feel thrifty. These are some cool things, and cool pictures of me, that I got for cheap.


Scarf - One Dollar
I found a scarf just like this a few weeks after sold at H&M. But mine.. is old. It had new tags! It didn't even smell!
Jackets - Three Dollars
Plus, this photo lets you know what I look like completely amused if you don't know me and you want to meet Grace Young. In that case, right-oh.


I hate this dress. It was something like, three things for five bucks at the yard sale at the house across the street from Steven's new place. I hate this dress. It fits just fine. But I hate this dress. It's so amazing it makes me feel like I can live forever. As long as I duck the hate bullets from people with taste and continue to live in refuge as a hipster because this is the hipster death dress. It might be my birthday dress!


Coolest find? Maybe. These shoes were one dollar instead of four because the boy at Goodwill loves how I just make him laugh and laugh and laugh. Hardy har har at the hilaritay.



Peace out.

Dorothy Young

I thought that I would start this off with a familiar face. Dorosister is my sister and a key staple in my life. I met her when she whispered that she loved me inches from my booty when my address was still 1234 Mothers Womb.

I will write about people I love in here too, because you cannot meet people everyday. Dorosister is a lot of important things that make my Dad more proud of her than me. It is all okay though, because I am really trying to be like Michelle Williams and not hate on Beyonce just because she is fabulous because I am special in my own special way and eventually I will grow up and sing The Greatest Love of All on the Oprah Winfrey Show because that happens to be a dream of mine alright. She (Dorothy Young not Michelle Williams, Kelly Rowland or BEYONKERZ. Or Oprah.) is funny and loud and aggressive and smart and a fine Irish Jigdancer, if I could say so myself. I love and hate her at times, which ultimately means I love her forever and ever ever because I have found that the only people I would die for are those who I can simultaneously love and hate at the same time.

One

Since the year will be starting soon, and I am such an important person, I thought that I would make a blog about my life. I guess I meet a lot of strange personalities just walking around, because I believe (probably in a far too naive way) that everyone has each others best intentions in mind, and that everyone could use a new friend. This summer alone, I've met incredible people on the bus, waiting around, in lines, and in yarn shops. This blog will be about my life and the people I meet. Introduction post finished!